The Poopdeck

Ahoy, mateys! Cap'n Slappy and Ol' Chumbucket will perform at 6:30 p.m. Thursday, Jan. 20, at the Oregon Trader, 140 Northeast Hill St., Albany, OR. We'll be doing some of our original schtick and trying a few new things, including a live "Ask Cap'n Slappy."

There's no cover charge. The Trader is an Albany brew pub that makes a variety of excellent beers (and a pretty good root beer.) We're hoping to fill the place with friendly faces who'll laugh whether we're funny or not (although we certainly plan to be funny.)

The Oregon Trader is open to those 21 and older.
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The Story Continues

For the last week Slappy and I have been using our blog to tag-team a pirate story, and we hope that you've come along for the ride. The saga of The Festering Boil has already taken some unexpected twists and it's a lot of fun to write. To find it, go to our main page, http://talklikeapirate.com/piratehome.html, and scroll down to the blog link Depending on which version of the page you've got (our ISP has two servers that are apparently difficult to synchronize) it's either right above or right under the photo of Our Close Personal Friend, Pulitzer Prize-winner Dave Barry.

If you want to catch it from the very beginning, and you might want to although it's not strictly necessary, you have to go to the "Archive" menu on the left side of the page and click "January 2005." Then scroll down to "A Pirate Tale - 1" and begin.

The way we work is, I write Monday, Wednesday and Friday. Slappy writes Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday. On the seventh day we rest. We do not discuss where the story is going. That would spoil part of the fun for us. The whole thing started as a writing exercise and has become an obsession.

We hope you enjoy it.

It's almost Valentines Day

Okay, here's the commercial part of our story. It's a well known fact that most guys are just hopeless when it comes to Valentines Day. Really, no matter what we get for the woman in our lives, it's almost certain to be wrong.

Well, Cap'n Slappy and I are here to give you the perfect gift for the holiday that celebrates romance. Click over to our Cafe Press store, and you'll find loads of great gifts. Scroll all the way to the bottom and there it is!!! The Cap'n Slappy Wall Clock!!! The perfect gift for Valentines Day! Cap'n Slappy's grinning (leering?) face with the legend, "It's Slappy Time!"

What better way to say "I love you" to that special someone than a clock designed to take five minutes off your life every time you look at it? We gave it to some friends for a housewarming gift and they seriously thought about hanging it over their bed.

They opted for the family room.

It would also make a great gift for National Secretary's Day, which is coming up April 25!
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--Ol' Chumbucket, editor